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By a Thread
Nearly weekly I’m hearing of mother-friends in a similar season of life, with kids in elementary school or slated towards middle, heading back to their careers or starting off in new vocations. They are doing what is called “going back to work”. It must be relieving for them to no longer have to answer the question that everyone is thinking and some explicitly ask, “So what will you do now that the kids are in school?” I’ve witnessed this migration for a few years. Some friends blossom a hobby or side-gig into a successful small business, some increase their hours in a part-time job, and some head back to school…
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Must Listen
My friend sent me this talk several weeks back, and she was sent it several years ago. So yes it’s a bit old as far as things on the Internet go, but I think the message to mothers is so excellent. It’s just an 18 minute listen. I don’t know how many of us deaden the passion in our souls, but I know there are quite a few people who have forgotten who they are. They’ve checked out for their own reasons, and maybe they thought they hit the pause button but hit delete instead. I have thoughts — so many thoughts on this topic — but I’m just…
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Am I doing this right?
When I was a brand new mama, I spent the first six months seeking answers from google, online forums and a friend who was a couple months ahead of me and had read far more parenting books than myself. I struggled to have confidence in the job I was doing. The strength of opinions coming at me from all sides undermined what little confidence I had in my abilities to be a good mom. Other than other panicked mothers on baby forums posting pictures of odd rashes and five-minute play by plays of their baby’s fevers, I came across very few parents who would, in a place of vulnerability, offer…
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Tying Rafts Together
Yesterday I posted the following on Facebook, which seemed to resonate with fellow moms and women in general: If I could give any advice to new mothers it would to tie your rafts together. When the waves get high, don’t cut each other loose. Those friendships are precious and there will be a time when the waters calm and you get to float for a bit and sip your margaritas, but don’t go at it alone when times are hard, because nothing is sadder than drinking alone when times are good. Early in motherhood, probably in the first six months of my firstborn’s life, I felt isolated. Whether this was…
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Gardens and Friendships and Really Long Metaphors
I used to really have fun with analogies and expounding on a metaphor. Due to my high level of enjoyment of nature, and using nature for examples, and due to the fact that nature can be icky, for awhile some friends called me “slightly gross analogy girl.” I was okay with it. So I’m going to metaphorize here in this little web space that rarely gets tended to anymore. Lately I’ve been thinking on friendship. It seems that even when a woman is well out of high school, friendships can still feel rather, well, “high school”. Perhaps not the friendships themselves lack maturity, but the concern over them and drama…
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The Myth of the Highest Calling
When I was trudging through my first pregnancy, what caught me off guard wasn’t all the strange physical changes that overtook my body or the people who felt the liberty to bowl through my carefully constructed arm’s length bubble of comfort to make friendly with their hands on my belly. What caught me off guard was the way my self-perception so drastically changed. The week before I got the double pink line on the pee stick, I’d walked across the stage of the RBC center with triple lines on my sleeves indicating the three levels of hell I’d walked to earn my PhD in Engineering. The year leading up to…
